Another week in the best life ever!

Helllooo family!

Mom's questions first: There's not a McDonald's close of any other fast food......and I can't think of anything else right now for you to send me. THANK YOU! I forgot to tell Pres about Uncle Ross......lol I'll do it next time I see him. And they forward the letters in the mail. Or if we stop by the office they'll give us the mail they have......whatever's quicker. We shop at a market down the street. There's not a WinCo or Walmart around.......I haven't even seen a real grocery store since I've been here......unless you count a Walgreens :)

Okay disclaimer for this week: I mix up spelling of English words.....my brain can only handle one language at a time.....so excuse the spelling please :)

1. To start things off, let me tell you of a story from church yesterday. For the last hour, we had relief society and priesthood combined. And the bishop was giving a little plug for reading the book of mormon......cause a lot don't do it here. And he was telling them they should want to read it because it was written by their ancestors. He was saying, "Our parent's were the Lamanites!" and then this lady sitting on the same row as me looks at me and points and yells "What about her!? She's not a lamanite.....she's white!" Of course everyone turns around and looks at me....and everyone starts laughing and teasing me because I don't have Book of Mormon ancestors. Finally after about a minute of people trying to talk over each other about how I don't belong, the Bishop was like "Okay, okay. Calm down." Wow, embarrassing. LOL (grandma, that means "laugh out loud" now)

2. It's like a 3rd world country here. No one has dishwashers......which doesn't mean its 3rd world but thats just the first thing that popped into my head. But it's great because instead of serving my mission in one country, I get to meet tons of different people......and most people here just got here 3 or less years ago. My favorites so far are the D.R.s (Dominican Republic) and the Mexicans, because their accents are the easiest to understand......and the DR are hilarious.

3. Just to prove that I'm in the hood, I'm going to enlighten everyone but MOM: do NOT freak out. I am completely safe and if you freak out from this story I'll start sending boring emails. Okay, so we were visiting an inactive in the ward and she told us that the other day she was at the park with her kids and her cousin and her kids... and there were 2 groups of 5 men. Then all of a sudden one pulled out a knife and another pulled out a gun. And a lady was yelling "Please, not here! The children!" So everyone started running away as the fight started. And the cops never even came. Boom. Welcome to the streets. But no worries, cause we never have any time to go to the park :)

4. Well, it's offical. A member told me the other day that the Empire State building now has bed bugs and so does J-Lo's house. Not sure how J-Lo all the sudden became a credible source, but apparently if J-Lo has it, it's only a matter of time before we do. So when we leave people's houses now, we check each other for bed bugs......thankfully I've only had roaches so far :)

5. WARNING: this story contains a strong word and is not for children under 5. The other day Mamon (1 of the 2 English sisters that lives in our pad) was at a recent converts house eating dinner and they were feeding them these peppers or something and Mamon said it was really spicy. The member asked if she wanted anymore or something and she said "Oh, no thanks. My testicules are on fire!" She told us she meant to say intestines or insides, but testicules came out. We were peeing ourselves laughing......I can't even imagine how funny it was in the moment. The converts nonmember son who is our age stopped what he was doing and just starred at her. (Side note: I LOVE Mamon. She is from Russia which automatically makes her cool. But besides that, she is handsdown one of the funniest people ever.)

6. Claudia is one of our investigators and she just committed to be baptized on the 19th of Sept! We're super pumped but she didn't come to church yesterday so she's gonna get it when we go over next time. We cleaned her kitchen and living room with the Elders last week. We threw away a lot of inappropriate entertainment from the living room when she wasn't looking.......muhahahah!

7. While doing weekly planning in the chapel on Thursday, a church maintanence man ran in and said "Sisters, I need your help! Bring your scriptures!" He had some man he was trying to teach outside who randomly had been outside the church. So we talked with him for a while and after he tried to start bible bashing, my awesome companion said "Why are you here? Are you here to learn or teach us or somehting else?" And he said "I'm here to get my name taken off the records of the church." Wow. So the English Elders started talking to him but he didn't understand english so I was translating.....and then another set of elders were listening in......so it ended up being 6 missionaires and this one guy. He finally left and we told him how to get ahold of the bishop to get his name removed. Apparently his sister died in his arms and he doesn't believe the church is true anymore. It seriously broke my heart.

8. The ward has an Elders quorum activity every Friday night but with latin culture it's always a party so the women end up showing up.......so basically we have a ward party every friday night......and we bbq and we bring investigators. LOVE it

Well, I ran out of time so we only have a top 8 this week........and I really AM having a lot of great spiritual experiences but I'm only writing the "fun", worldly stuff cause that's what the girls want.......but eventually I'll merge with the typical missionary emailing lol.

LOVE YOU ALL!

Shout outs this week go to:

Kaly! (THANK YOU for the cake-bites......sorry I forgot to thank you before! they were AMAZING!)

Grandma! LOVED your emails and I'm excited for your letters.

Beth......congrats on the car! Whew Mom and Dad, forking over the cash for your favorite daughters yet again......oh and I'm glad you're loving the love package I sent......I want a full report when you're done with it

Brenna.....congrats on passing the test......I'll pray you get a job! And glad your new roommates seem nice!

Em and Bug.....super excited for my fav girlies to start school! LOVE you both!

Mom.....yes, you are my favorite mother :) that's all lol

Dad......I basically have the best dad ever......I don't know anyone else who receives weekly awesome emails like that from their dad

Aunt Di......glad to hear everyone is rocking it. Uncle Keith with his race being the party man he is. And both Laura and Park in HS......crazy! Give everyone a hug for me! And way to go with the Book of Mormon!

Love the mish. Be the mish.

Hermana Winfield